Anonymous asked: i found out about asexuality not long ago and finally felt understood. i never got why the whole sex-thing became so important to everyone but me. then i found your blog and reading the asks you answer help me to become more sure that i'm ace. thx :)

You’re more than welcome. I know that many of us felt the same way you did so I’m glad that I could help!

lanilupee asked: hii ! loveeee your blog, can some asexuals be bisexual as well ? for example, they either like everyone or no one at all , b/c thats what im feeling right now like i hate boys and girls equally as i love boys and girls but with no sexual desires. i dont identify myself as bi, i just think of people as people ... is there also a need to "come out" ? b/c at the end of the day all thats different about me is that i dont want to have sex w/ people .. HELP PLEASE !!

Thank you for the compliment!

Onto your questions…Instead of connecting other sexual orientations to their identities (like bisexual asexual) many asexuals take their prefixes and attach them to the term -romantic to describe their romantic orientation separately. In this case, biromantic asexual might be the term that fits how you feel.

And there is absolutely no need for you to tell anyone about your asexuality if you don’t want to. Many people feel comfortable shouting it from the mountaintop, while others, like you, don’t like to make a big deal about it. Even if related topics come up, you can explain how you feel without ever going into detail. How you identify is always up to you.

mynameisnotmae asked: Thank you for everything. I'm not questioning for a long time now but sometimes I do feel like the asexual community has no place for aces with a sex drive. But you get it right, you correct people (sometimes yourself) and you make me belong. Seeing someone standing up for me just makes me so happy. Thank you.

You’re very welcome! I’ve seen some of the hate thrown towards people who identify as asexual but don’t meet the strict requirements that some people apply to the identity. Though I can’t change everyone’s mind, I can always make sure that this a safe place for anyone who needs it.

Anonymous asked: Hey so I'm just learning about asexuality and I was wondering if asexual people still have orgasms during sexy?

Yes, they can. Asexuality is an orientation based on sexual attraction, not an individual’s physical reaction to sexual activity.

Any inability to reach climax is a different issue.


Ace and Aro August is a celeration of asexual and aromantic spectum characters in fanfiction taking place from 1st-31st August. Fanfiction is very often centred around romance and sex and it can be difficult to find characters who are asexual or aromantic, not helped by the lack of characters who are canonically so. This is an opportunity for our communities to celebrate characters like us. All identities within these spectums are welcomed here, including, but not limited to, grey, demi, akoin and quoi identities.

Anyone can take part and submissions will be welcomed from any fandom, whether they’re short pieces or multi-chaptered works. Submissions in languages other than English are welcomed. The aim is to create new fanfiction but previous works will also be accepted.

Why are aro and ace people being grouped together? They’re not the same thing.

Firstly, there is overlap within these communities. Both face similar problems in how they are viewed and treated and many people identify with both spectrums. Secondly, I don’t know how popular this will be. If it’s successful enough to run again with separate months for each community then that may well happen.

In what format will submissions be accepted?

Any of the following:

  • For submitted works posted on sites such as AO3 and a link to those will be posted

  • Works posted on individual blogs will be reblogged. Please submit a link to the post and it will be reblogged from there.

  • Works can be directly submitted into the submit box.

Are there any rules?

Just a few:

  1. Your work must include at least one character who is asexual, aromantic, or both.

  2. Any work that is anti-aromantic or anti-asexual, including any identity within those spectrums, will not be accepted.

  3. Tags or warnings should be used to indicate sexual or romantic content.

Please reblog and share this and feel free to ask any questions.

textingscones-andmurder asked: Hi my name is Jessica and so is my best friend who came out to me as asexual recently. At the same time she's starting to explore her new-found sexuality, she's fallen in love and she's extremely confused. She's having a hard time opening up to me about her problem because its one I can't directly relate to as a sexual person. Could you possibly point me in the direction of websites, groups, and resources where she might be able to find people to talk to. I'm sorry for the safe space invasion.

You don’t ever have to apologize for coming with good intentions.

You can find an absolutely fantastic list of asexual blogs and websites with entries both on and off tumblr HERE.

A personal recommendation if she’s looking for some advice would be Asexuals Anonymous. The mods there always give great answers.

And of course, you could always point her in my direction if she wants to chat or has any questions. I’m always happy to help and we can talk privately if need be.

I hope this helps. Don’t hesitate to visit again if you need anything else.

Sure, some asexuals choose to have sex for their partners, but you don’t ever have to have sex if you don’t want to.

I repeat: You don’t have to have sex if you don’t want to. EVER.

Don’t let anyone guilt you into having sex to keep them interested. Anyone that selfish is NOT WORTH KEEPING.


I’m baffled at all these posts saying “I’m (asexual / aromantic / nonamorous / queer / on the autism spectrum / different / etc.). Am I even human?”

Were you born Homo sapiens sapiens? Do you have a human brain?

Congratulations, you’re human. And don’t let anyone ever tell you you’re not.

Anonymous asked: I recently came out as asexual to my mom, who doesn't really understand it but she accepts it! I finally feel more open to be myself :-)


Props to your mom for being so supportive; that kind of support does go a long way. And I’m glad that you gained confidence in your identity. Always stay positive!

Thanks for sharing!

Anonymous asked: I just want to share my happines about how great my friends are. They just accept the fact that I have no sexual interest in anyone and don't try to convince me otherwise. :)


Just as it should be! I’m happy to hear that you’ve got some great friends in your corner.

Thanks for sharing!